the next night came all too quickly for me. Here i was a man in my thirties as nervous as a five year old getting sent to the headmasters office for the first time. i sat on my bed looking into the mirror at the man looking back. my hair was thinning from crash helmets, my stomach protruding after far too many fried breakfasts., my face was wrinkled after too many years of living. i thought to myself,
"what could a woman like her see in a man like me?"
for better or worse i was nothing more than a low paid office worker and biker. even now as i sat in my empty house bike parts littered teh downstairs. all through the kitchen different bits of machinery sat on old sheets of newspaper on the floor. i smiled as i remembered tripping on a part this morning. the blur of the nights sleep still in my eyes and coffee cravings running through my body. i caught my toe on the top of a greased up shaft and nearly ended up having my morning wash in the stale washing up water of the night before. still here i sit in front of my mirror. the shirt i have on hasn't seen an iron since i bought it last summer. the jeans, though the cleanest i have, are covered in grained in grease and dirt. not that i was too worried about this particular pair of jeans. all my jeans have a permanent air of dirty to them. no matter how much i wash them. as i glance at my watch i realise that time had moved since i'd looked last. i had to be going. our date was set to begin at eight in the Lamb and Flag. it was behind this very pub sixteen years ago i had first met her. i'm hoping that because this first date of our second chance will be in a more pleasant atmosphere that our relationship will grow stronger. did i just say relationship? is that really what i want? though it's true i've never felt anything for anyone as strong as i feel it for her i'm not syre a relationship is what either of us want. still i stand up and take one last look in the mirror. no time to change now. i grab my coat and leave the house heading for the Lamb and Flag.