When a friend of mine got divorced recently she was very amiable. She said he could have half of everything they had bought together. How reasonable, I thought... until I went to visit her one evening to find her chopping all his suits in half, slicing through the cd collection and contemplating getting a chainsaw to cut the sofa in half! But the bit which really made me chuckle was before the divorce was finalised she only ironed one half tof his shirts so he would go to work with one side all crisp and ironed and the other side more crumpled than a street tramp, lol. She should have just eaten cake and smeared it inside his undies instead!
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