*****Pet Chronical writes - Is he or isn't he ?

[B][SIZE="2"][COLOR="Blue"]Late News just received
*****Pet Chronical - Evening Edition
Reporter: Verbyllis Waffle[/COLOR][/SIZE][/B]

Ms Agnes Snott, nosey neighbour who lives over the road, next door but one and opposite woc member Mischa, proud owner mother of the two recently born aracnid baby brothers whose birth mother is Beryl the Peril (I should get some Royalties paid every time I mention your Spider Shazzababie! - takes a deep breath) was seen taking her second son Katana 刀 to the *****Pet Baby Clinic this afternoon heavily wrapped in cobwebs, she told reporter Verbyllis Waffle.

Suspecting baby battering Ms Snott contacted the local *****Pet Child Protection Social Services Team who told her they'd look into the matter.

More was to be revealed as Miss Snott confided in reporter Verbyllis Waffle that whilst admitting to being optically challenged, swears blind that the baby boy known as Katana 刀 has changed colour 5 times since his birth and is now bright PINK.

"She's battering 'im" insisted Ms Snott "ow else would ee get that colour? She's been dipping 'im in ot fat bettcha" she winked at Verbyllis Waffle then wheezed and coughed up a lump of green phlem into a custard coloured hankie.

"Cuppa tea or summit?" she asked the reporter who hastily declined looking at her watch and rising in a hurry, made an excuse of another pressing engagement then backed slowly out of the front parlour down the dingy lit hallway that reaked of cat piss and stale chips to the front door with its peeling paint and rusty hinges.

"Come again deary, I might have more to tell you in a day or two" Ms Snott called after her as Verbyllis Waffle climbed into her bright red Porche and roared off into the distance................................